angstoic.com Astrologer, Ang Stoic
Sol’s nebulous journey through the watery depths of Pisces now takes him towards the mysterious direction of Neptune, whose promise of endowing him with the gifts of an all-embracing utopian vision is simply too alluring to refuse.
In anticipation to meeting Neptune, he develops a great sense of wonderment, his idealistic visions become lost in dreams, and those dreams take on a much more vivid, surrealistic turn, where colours and shapes seem to bend and old realities warp to fit into the ever more incredible and the fantastical visions of his expectations of what meeting Neptune is going to be all about. His imagines this conjunction is going to deliver him to a promised land of interdimensional access to all the abundant gifts of the universe.
He imagines.
And feels himself drifting off into a most phantasmagorical state, his head elastically lifting off into the clouds, whilst his body deeply submerged into the cool, watery depths of the Piscean seas. He feels so high, so exuberantly blissful like he is in the kingdom of heaven – he feels no pain; his worries are dissolved away; his physical ailments are all gone and he feels connected to all of life, and all of eternity seems to be running though him.
Wow… how can it feel so good?
Yet his idea of himself seems a bit offbeat and bizarrely twisted… Is he losing his sense of identity?
And where is this Neptune guy?
In all the bliss and hallucinatory chimera, Sol becomes slightly disengaged from his focus. Did he forget his way? Did he fail to honour this most purposeful meeting with the trident King of the seas?
And what on earth are Mercury and Venus garbling about up ahead there? The whole experience seems so surreal, as if he’s woken from a dream that now seems elusively impossible to interpret, and his reality confused between strange facts and tantalising fictions, and though he sees with his own eyes the very figures and signposts all around him, Sol really struggles to make out just what is credible and what is simply beyond disbelief, feeling suspicious that it’s all been put there to mislead him.
Struggling hopelessly to get his mind back on track he observes that he has become at risk of being lost, confused, disillusioned and his general physical energy feels entirely depleted. It’s best, he figures, not to try to make anything out of anything, just keep on paddling. But which way??
He feels drained, unable to come up with neither a clue, nor plan, nor muster energy to make an effort…
He suspects that he might have missed his meeting with Neptune altogether. Somewhere, just back there a little, he became so adrift by the swirlstream of otherworldly visions that he lost focus with his mission. He can’t even remember what that was. Perhaps it wasn’t important. He’s not sure.
Little does he know, that he had indeed encountered Neptune, the otherworldly god whose invisible, indefinable, infinitely ungraspable form presents itself more as a spirit, and whose effects are rather to dissolve his self-definitions, his boundaries, to undermine his pretensions and re-define hime – refine him – spiritualise and elevate his soul to such heights that he feels at once connected to the great oneness of infinity (and beyond) but also disengaged from any tangible forms.
Sol has met Neptune.
Yet Sol is still expecting.
This exhaustion, sense of confusion and utter vulnerability to what might happen leaves him wondering about his whole entire destiny. He ceases to struggle.
An awful feeling of despair and despondency descends as he begins to question who he even is any more. He seeks to know himself.
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As the night falls, he lies flat upon his back. Floating on the surface of the vast blue sea, his mind now wholly surrendered to the heavens above. He sees the stars. Not just a few, but many. They look like him but they are so distant. He had never noticed them like this before. Not as many, but as one. He notices how all stars mesh together and form a unified canopy, illuminating and connecting with spirit to that of the universe, creating a vast and awe inspiring panorama of light and symphony of beingness. As the sea beneath him becomes totally still he eventually comes to view the starry heavens as one great single canopy.
And all at once a miracle occurs…
The realisation that he himself is, after all, but very little….
Out here, cast out in the infinite Piscean paradise, he is both nowhere and everywhere at once. In the scheme of this vast, infinite powerlessness he becomes at once humbled.
He becomes consciously aware that he is but only one slight infinitesimal particle among billions of others souls; that nothing he does will ever really really matter unless it fits into the bigger scheme; that his efforts are not really about him, but all about his contribution to the greater collective effort; that in the eyes of all the other stars he is just another distant glimmer, his light meshing softly among the twinkling of the billions, trillions of others shimmering lights, altogether forming infinite clusters of distant constellations for every other distant castaway…
This is what becomes most humbling, and at the same time, most positively moving for him emotionally…
…and a tear rolls down his face.
All at once, our Hero starts to see with clarity again. He fully experiences this clear vision as a collective consciousness, one that does not hold him separate form anything. The fuzziness and confusion disappears, as he now knows with certainty that his soul is inextricably linked with that of every other soul. Though he may know that individually his place in the universe is small, relatively insignificant on his own, he acknowledges too that his spirit is totally connected to that of the greater spirit of universal intent.
Once again he feels at home. A sense of overwhelming certainty has returned to his core and has completely reinstated him with the necessary faith that he is already where he’s meant to be.
As he looks ahead, he sees the wounded centaur Chiron. He has a special lesson to share with Sol.
© All rights reserved, Ang Stoic
see also….
The Sol Journey: Sun in Pisces
Whether you are transiting through a difficult period, or simply wish to enhance your life with deeper meaning, the personal horoscope provides all the clues on how to best navigate through even the roughest part of your journey. Find out more here…
Profound. It really hit home. Thanks Ang.