If this next week (or two) makes a fitting summary to the crippling events of the past month, then it’s apt to say too that the past month kinda sews up the whole past year for us. This past… horrible… very difficult year.
It may seem, amid the hardship and the maelstrom, that was 2018, that this would be a pretty awful time to be alive. On a global level, this past 12 months could not have been more turbulent, given all the terrible and accelerating effects of climate change, wildfires destroying huge areas, hurricanes wiping entire communities off the map, and a planet that is slowly dying because we can’t stop fucking it up.
Meanwhile, the rise of fascist and alt-right political movements, increased abuses on billions of peoples’ civil rights, privacy, freedom of speech, even the shady veracity of our media agencies is becoming undone to the point where we can no longer trust anyone. The constant violent conflicts, millions of stateless refugees, the dire situation in the Middle East, a looming Brexit crisis and the collapse of the EU, the political turmoil and unrest in the US, with mass shootings every other day (and sometimes every day), ever-deeper corruption emerging Russia, Saudi Arabia & China as well as a divestment of order in many other directions (like the world trade agreement) still yet to be fully uncovered.
One cannot argue that 2018 has been exceptionally abominable.
On a personal level, many of you might have come into this new year hoping that it might at least be better than 2017. But, from all accounts, things seem to have only gotten worse. From my own professional experience, I’m seeing more onew clients coming to me feeling greater hopelessness and distress about the time ahead. You may be feelings that for all your planning and anticipation, nothing’s quite turning out as you expected – people around you becoming more distant, desperate and detached, and even those moments which were meant to be loving and joyous are becoming tense and impossible to enjoy.
So what’s the story? Why is it that nothing out there is able to make us happy any more? Why is it that whatever we expect to bring us even the slightest satisfaction usually turns into a problem, or leads us further into ennui and disdain? Why does everything always go wrong, like the whole world is against us? Is the universe conspiring to always put a dampener on our joy?
For those of you who are losing sleep, anxious and worried, caught up in the big, apocalyptic crises that need urgent attention, yet feel quite powerless to do anything to affect, these worries aren’t necessarily a bad sign. It means you are awakening to the skin-crawling effects that our dear planet may not necessarily be under the helm of its greatest ever management. Perhaps it’s never been, and you’re only just realising this. Your despair and fatigue about this is a sign that you are now stimulated to do something. Something else. Something worthy and genuine. Something true. You are learning that despite your best attempts to stay self-centered and to mind only your own business that your own matters are actually bigger than you.
In this case, it may also be a sign that, ‘#youtoo’ are actually bigger than just little old ‘#you’.
If you look back, you may notice that the more you’ve tried to make this about you, and your own personal happiness (or despair), the more you’ve seemed to struggle just to make it through each day.
Sure, you may keep telling yourself that “things are going to improve tomorrow”, that “if only you can just make it through one more day, maybe some twist of fate… some miracle might come along and turn things around for you”.
But really?? You’ve probably been wishing that for many months now, and whilst you have managed to persevere and survive, nothing substantial appears to be improving. Nothing is getting better at all. In fact, you question whether things are actually getting so bad that they may never get good again.
These are the negative effects of a year of Saturn in Capricorn and Jupiter in Scorpio. We have been brought to the brink of heartache and utter despair. The harsh reality of things has started to hit home so terminally for nearly everyone – the Lord of Karma guarantees us a very sobering coming-down-to-earth experience. Even the most optimistic and hopeful of individuals seem challenged in keeping up their usual charade of mirth and happiness, and though they try to look on the lighter side – trying to convince themselves (and others) that these challenges will make us come out stronger than ever before, we’re not exactly convinced that that’s the truth. Indeed, the evidence seems to be stacking up to the opposite ends.
Right now, many of us are feeling depleted and weak. The New Moon squaring Neptune shows how deflating this time has been. Exhausted from the ongoing confusion and apparent meaninglessness, there is a tremendous difficulty in trying to determine what the next move is supposed to be.
If it feels like every time you make a decision, it’s the wrong one, or every time you say something, it comes out as offensive or inappropriate, or every time you try to take an executive step you face further alienating or upsetting someone, then you are not alone…
You see, we are all trapped in an intricately tangled web. Trying to change our lives in any one direction is becoming invariably more complicated because, as we are discovering, everything seems to be interconnected in an delicately spun maze of complex networks. So of course, going in any one direction is going to create turbulent waves and complications in all other areas.
Naturally, it will appear like the more you tease it the more you fuck it up it up; that every effort you make only contributes further to the maelstrom. So you may have come to a place of complete inertia, reluctant to do anything for fear it may make things worse. And while you may declare that you are not the one who’s causing all the problems; that someone else is to blame for dragging you into their never-ending drama, it’s still impossible to escape the chaos and demise because it dawns on you that after all we are all somehow responsibly implicit in this mess.
So how do you leave a toxic relationship when your entire social world is designed to keep you in it? How do you quit that soul-destroying job when your entire survival mechanism keeps insisting that you keep turning up and turning your little cogs? How do you fix a government so corrupted by power when there are simply no sensible solutions? How do you deal with ever-extreme climate swings when our entire global economy depends on fossil fuels and its nature-polluting industrial processes?
As the year draws to an end, you may just question whether your own suffering is ever going to end as well. You may seriously question whether anything in this world will ever be okay again. The answer to that dilemma lies in your personal approach and how you see yourself getting through 2019.
One thing you must accept is that you cannot possibly hope to move forward and still employ the old means and measures of the past. That much you know. You cannot solve any of your current dissatisfactions and still hang on to the same self-centred, short-sighted, consumerist dependencies on toxic products like processed products, oil, plastics and disposable lifestyles. Nor can you expect to have better relationships with your partner, your family, your children or your boss and still engage using the same toxic behaviours.
Unless you set your resolve to shift into a more affirmative stance, approach the new year with intent to improve your attitude, nothing is going to change for you. You know this.
2019 not only promises to be more of the same, but you will certainly hit dire straits by the end of that year if you do not devote all hope that things are definitely going to improve for you. And you must absolutely mean it. This means that you need to fight any apathy, lethargy, negativity and procrastination, get off your ass and get on with making a staunch effort to move forward.
Your undivided faith is your only hope out of this. Belief that things are going to get better for you and for everyone around you, from your closest allies to your dearest, darkest enemy. Faith, that unless you see how intertwined your greatest efforts are with those of everybody else you will not only feel like you are being undermined but that you yourself are letting down the entire ‘Team Planet Earth 2019′. This is it.
There are no shortcuts in the year which begins with a tough, Sun/Saturn conjunction in Capricorn. This next year is a year of highest standards, and harshest consequences; where the intention and determination must be to follow through on resolutions made on January 1; where you are dedicated to working hard – harder than you have ever worked before to achieve solid results or suffer the consequences more seriously than ever. Disbelieve this only at your peril.
Jupiter in Sadge will be there to inspire and encourage you to pursue your truest faith versus all Neptunian tendencies to slip into lazy slouching, netfix escapism, druggy dreamisms and phoney social media activisms.
Neptune in Pisces is going to challenge your Jupiterian hubris and hypocritical excesses, lifting you out of self-serving arrogance and into the quantum realms where you can find ultimate humility and compassion for others. You are going to have to stay clear of pretenses and wishful thinking – there is no dream that excludes, blames or victimises anyone. You will be tested to demonstrate the force of your conviction by going after precisely what you believe. It is vital that you pursue your quest as passionately as possible, with aim to find greater meaning, and do this on your own.
You are going to have to make drastic changes if you want 2019 to be different to 2018. The stakes are higher, and there is no time left but the present. But you knew that already. You know that what’s happening now is no longer a rehearsal. There are no safety nets and no more second chances. You will either triumph in reconnecting to the collective intent, or lose everything because it is meaningless to you without this connection.
This is it, and you are ready. Perfectly ready to take on whatever life is going to throw your way. You’ve always been ready. It’s just that now you are ready to accept this as your truth, hold faith enough that you are capable of doing your best to demonstrate your worthiness.
Everything will change for you because it must change. It cannot continue this old way. This way is not sustainable and you know it. You simply do not have the resources, the energy or wherewithal to support it. You must put an end to your lame addictions, your nasty habits and your toxic attachments. Stop putting yourself last, feeling sorry for yourself, feeling at the behest and mercy of others. Step immediately into your power and say “STOP THIS – I will not pursue this way for myself any longer. I don’t believe it’s working for me any more”. Then move on courageously.
I’m very sorry that 2018 has been such a bummer for you. However, it has not entirely been a waste of a year…. nor has this year completely drawn to a close just yet. In the remaining three weeks, we have just enough time to look back and see just how critically important the past eleven months has been in raising the level of urgency for us to stand up and take notice.
If nothing else, 2018 has made us aware just how empty and futile our lives can be when we lose all hope meaningfulness in our lives, struggling purely to achieve self-serving gains. Posturing our phoney status and self-importance on short-sighted, immediately gratifying and bitchfightingly divisive engagements brings us nothing but isolation and despair.
Keeping that up is surely going to end badly for you, and you know it.
Besides, it ain’t gonna happen on your watch. You are far too wise to repeat the same old mistakes as 2018 and expect wonderful new outcomes in 2019… right?
Blessings, and have an amazing week ahead…
© All rights reserved, Ang Stoic 2018
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